Joel Ruud: Joel has been promised the second greatest adventure of all time and lives in an elaborate underground sewer system that he himself designed and dug without any form of permission from any city official. He enjoys climbing trees, bruising knees, and singing in key.
Joey Hines: Joey doesn't really know what he's doing at any given moment. His dream is to live in the back of a Winnebago and explore the deepest crevices of Canada, but he will settle for a Keystone. Joey most recently won the Puppy Bowl and we're all very proud of him.
Grant Nordine: Grant literally vanished off the face of the Earth for two years. When he resurfaced, he was face down in a bowl of bean dip at your local Mexican restaurant. Grant currently works for a job that he can't tell us anything about which makes us very suspicious of his intentions.
Music and lyrics to "A Night At the Opera" written by a team of well-trained monkeys who were told to write Shakespeare and instead produced this story arc. We apologize to all those involved.